Extending Grace

Posted by Emily Abbott on

Let's get real for a second mamas..."threenager" is a real thing. It's alive and well causing parents everywhere to feel sorry for the world they are unleashing their preschooler on. 

My husband is a golfer, a hockey player, a let's-solve-this problem-with-few-words-and-no-tears kind of man. Love him. He has been blessed with two tea party loving, tutu wearing, let's-cry-about-everything daughters. I feel a little bad for him. He really had zero clue what he was getting into with two daughters and a creative, emotional wife. He spends a lot of time at night trying to recover from the shell shock of living in a home with three women. I remind him all the time that the cat is a male but it doesn't seem to matter. 

All kidding aside, being a mom is the hardest work I've ever done. It's hard because it requires every ounce of strength I possess. Not just physical strength (though hefting a 15lb baby in an infant carrier is seriously no joke) but emotional strength, mental strength, the kind of dig down deep there is wine or chocolate in your future if you survive this strength. 

I know we talk about how the job of motherhood is thankless. And it certainly can be. But can we also talk for a minute about the complications of raising a decent human being when we're not always decent ourselves? Just the other day I caught myself yelling at my 3 year old to stop yelling at me. Yeah. Definitely not a high point in our day. And I'm willing to bet each of you have found yourselves in similar situations. 

Some times I think how wonderful it is that we have therapists because at this pint I'm not sure how my kids will survive childhood without some kind of scar. But what about you mama? What kind of scars will you come through parenting with? I pray they are minimal but I know some of you are in survival mode and you're not sure how you're going to make it through. You are living each day on guilt and caffeine and tucking yourselves into bed at night with self loathing and dread for the next day. How do I know? Because I've been there. More then once.You aren't sure how you're going to make it. 

Recently I've been learning a life changing lesson. Parenting littles is hard yes, but there is hope and freedom in extending myself a little grace. Grace when I yell at my kids after promising I wouldn't. Grace when I eat that dessert that is not diet approved. Grace when I turn on the tv and warm dinner up in the oven because that's what I need to survive the day. 

Extending grace is more then just "washing your face" or not apologizing. That's just the start. It's believing you are of worth and realizing that you've already been extended an extraordinary amount of grace. You just need to embrace it. 


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